WHAT!?

Hell musta froze over yesterday when Ashley Olsen, the fatter half of the Olsen duo, gave our snappers a smirk. It wasn’t quite a cheeser, but if you think about all that muscle movement involved in making a grin, it probably burnt the few calories that allow her to walk. I’m thinking she’ll now go into seclusion until the air she breathes reloads the calories spent. Poor Ashley! Why can’t this Olsen be more like the other celebs making headlines? I mean, I know it’s winter and all, but why does she need to cover up so? Can’t she learn from role models like Pamela Anderson and Britney Spears? Less is more! Way less is Way more!