Get that blood-and-oil soaked paper, girl! Mediatakeout.com is reporting that Beyonce received two million dollars to perform at a private party for the family of Muammar al-Gaddafi. He’s the Libyan dictator best known for his stylin’ sunglasses and refusing to deliver the terrorists who murdered the passengers of Pan Am Flight 103 to justice. Baaaaallin’!! […]
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STARZLIFE PICS: David Spade Has a Bunch of Stuff On His Head
Look, it’s David Spade! He’s the man responsible for the best and funniest hour-long stand-up special in history, Take the Hit. “Oh, but Grant, surely you mean Chris Rock and Bring the Pain.” No, I don’t. And let me give you permission to quit pretending it’s better just because Chris Rock says the racist stuff […]
If Alice in Chains Can Get Back Together, Of Course Soundgarden Are Going To, Too
Wassup, rockers? Soundgarden is getting back together! For you younger Starzlife readers, Soundgarden were like Audioslave except Tom Morello was still in Rage Against the Machine. (For you younger Starzlife readers, Rage Against the Machine were like if Audioslave were 10,000 times better musically but only sang about freeing cop-killers from prison.) Lead shrieker Chris […]
The Love Guru Is So Bad People Are Going to Jail For Putting It On the Net
The tiers of movie anticipatory excitement are, in descending order: I want to see it in the theater opening weekend, I want to see it in the theater eventually, I want to watch it on DVD, I’ll catch it on cable, I’ll download it illegally, I’d rather read a book. Mike Meyers‘ The Love Guru […]
Ke$ha Can Change Her Name To Ke$$$$$$$ha Now, But That Would Be Pretty Stupid
Kongrat$, Ke$ha! You just set the record for most digital downloads of a single by a female artist by selling 610,000 digital copies of your fantastic track “Tik Tok.” You knocked Lady GaGa off the top spot, which she had held with her execrable “Just Dance.” Most downloaded ever remains Flo Rida’s “Right Round,” with […]
Take An Inspirational/Deflating Tour Through Lil’ Wayne’s Mansion
Did you ever see Master P’s episode of Cribs? Aside from the obviously tacky moments you’d expect, like pointing to giant framed oil paintings of himself, it had a part where he stopped in front of a small aquarium and said, “Dis right heah prob’ly da most elogwent fish tank in all Nah Orleans.” Yeah. […]
STARZLIFE PICS: Dakota Fanning Grew Up Pretty Hot
Phew! That’s a relief. Dakota Fanning makes a pretty young lady. She actually looks a little like Jessica Stam, except, you know, not that inhumanly good-looking (if we’re keeping it real). Dakota went to the gym so she can remain twig-thin. Starzlife was there. Bonus video! Hey, Dakota, congrats on not turning into this:
Check Out the Future of Airport Security
Sick of Muslims trying to murder you? Do you also hate being pat-down by some big lug at the airport who’s going to let explosive powder on the plane anyway? Check out these new security scanners coming to an airport near you! You don’t have to suffer the indignity of having someone rub their hands […]
Hunky Villain Alert! Brad Pitt Tapped for Sherlock Sequel
Brad Pitt is set to star is Professor Moriarty in the next Sherlock Holmes film, so says Popeater. Guy Richie, I know you read this, so can I take this moment to ask that you please play up the fact that Sherlock Holmes is a recreational cocaine user in the next film? You can do […]
Kim Kardashian Makes More Tweeting Than Twitter Makes Annually
I seriously love my tmobile blackberry! My service always works no matter what country I’m in! There. Kim Kardashian may have gotten paid ten thousand dollars for that. Or maybe the Cancun tourism bureau shelled out 10 Gs for “OMG look at my view from the ME [sic] CANCUN Hotel!!!” The point is, Kim Kardashian […]
